It has been over a week since the radiation treatments stopped. I thought it would settle down and I would start to heal but it has got worse. For some reason I cannot fathom, the rear of my thigh and behind the lump I am really sore. Not a little sore, a lot. I cannot properly sit on my left bum cheek and an angry blue red mottling has risen from within. I am guessing it is something to do with the flesh inside my thigh healing. The advice was to take it easy and I don't think I have taken it as easy as I should have.
Today I had a Thallium scan which tracks a small dose of a radioactive isotope injected into my arm. It shows up cold spots where blood may not be flowing and might therefore be a new tumor.
After that I had a CT scan over my torso as a Myxoid Lycosarcoma, if it is going to get started anywhere else, it's the lungs. I had something to eat and felt really tired at the hospital cafe. I waited a couple of hours and returned to have the Thallium tracked again as it had a good chance to distribute throughout my body. Another spell reading magazines and in for the MRI. That noisy claustrophobic machine took ages and I felt uncomfortable maintaining a stillness within its tunnel. But the photographs it took are good.
I sense at the periphery of all this, the process is changing me. Being in a hospital all day and having visited several times in the last few weeks, one get a sense of people suffering, getting old and the system looking after all of us. God help those in chaotic places like Libya. The process is leading me to a discussion on aging. What is it like, how does it feel? What is the change in words? We all experience it but is it the same for each of us? Does one become weaker and deeper or do layers fall of and slowly we become the essence of our life. Certainly the physical body shows up its weak points.
In the following days, this will be the theme to my experience. As a hint, I like it. Feels like a release from daily distractions.
Peace
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